CERTIFIED TABLE CAPTAIN

Ms. Goofy and I have added another badge to our growing list of barbeque credentials. We are now Certified Kansas City Barbeque Society Table Captain’s. This last Saturday we attended a certification class to qualify for this position. What is a Table Captain, you may ask? This is the person who presents barbeque entries to the barbeque judges. When judging a KCBS (Kansas City Barbecue Society) contest there are lots of rules, procedure, protocol, etiquette and not to forget fantastic bbq to sample and score. The cooks turn in their bbq entries to a KCBS representative in a given time frame. The entry is re-numbered to ensure blind judging and then presented to the Table Captain. The Table Captain then enters the entries in a specific method on a tally sheet. A tray that usually contains six different entries is brought to the judges table by the Table Captain. The Table Captain then presents the entries in a specific prescribed manner. These procedures must be followed to allow for fair and just judging. It is not a difficult task and can be rather fun. It is another position in our judging world that we are now officially certified to perform.

2nd ANNUAL SMOKE ON THE MOUNTAIN

It was a beautiful weekend to hold a BBQ contest in San Jose California. The thermometer hovered in the eighties while twenty four teams battled in the parking lot of the Mason’s Scottish Rite Center. This contest was held for the purpose of raising money to purchase baseball mitts for underprovided children. ‘Golden Rule 497 Masons’ and the San Francisco Jr. Giants’ had the goal of buying 1000 mitts from the proceeds of this event. The BBQ teams will compete in four meat categories of chicken, ribs, pork and brisket. After the competition the public will sample and enjoy these smoked meat treats. This event was the perfect venue to enjoy and participate in a smoky, tasty good time.

Ms. Goofy and I did not wear our ‘Master Judges Badges’ at this event. We were volunteers in the judging arena. This was a great opportunity to help out and still participate in this contest. We manned the doors that led into the judging area. We let the teams in at the appropriate time to be judged. Today’s event was not a ‘KCBS’ sanctioned event so the scoring was not held in the traditional form. The meats were judged for appearance, taste and tenderness but the judging was not blind. This entailed the teams presenting their entries in person to the judges and actually receiving scores and feedback immediately.

This method of judging was unique and provided an opportunity for judges and cookers to interact. Each judge would recite the score and explain the criteria for given total. This was an opportunity to learn how and why the judges scored. Each meat was judged individually instead of six at a time. This was time consuming. Being the doorman I got to interact with the cooks while they waited for their turn to be judged. It was a mixed bag of compliments, grumbles, gripes and elation from these BBQ competitors. This open forum of judging can be a great tool for learning. Hopefully this judging experience will benefit both judges and cooks.

Once the judging was completed it was time enjoy the festival. A lively band entertained this hungry crowd. A couple of adult beverages and interaction with our BBQ brethren made for a very enjoyable afternoon. The weather shined a summer glow of warmth over the grounds. We saw many barbeque sauce covered faces grinning with fabulous food approval. It was only a matter of time for the awards to be presented.

Congratulations are sent out to the Grand Champion team of ‘Smoky Luv BBQ’. Reserve Grand Champion went to ‘Bowling Over Pigs BBQ’ and his ‘too perfect chicken’. A great time was had by all and best of all some children will receive some brand new baseball mitts.

MASTER JUDGE ACCESSORIES

One must dress for success. Professionals, craftsmen and barbeque competitors all wear appropriate clothes for their field. I wear a custom 'Master Judge' shirt when I perform BBQ judging duties. It was time to accessorize my judging attire. Behold the latest Chilebrown '1977 Limited Edition Kingsford Belt Buckle". This paticular buckle is numbered 282 out of only 1000 made. The next competition you will see this judge strutting in style.

BARBEQUE at the LONDON BRIDGE

The ‘Racing Honda did a couple of laps this weekend. 1400 miles was the total distance traveled to Lake Havasu, Arizona with a side trip to Las Vegas. Our journey brings us to our first judging activity of this New Year. The“5th Annual Lake Havasu, Music, Brews & BBQ Championship” was held in the shadows of the “London Bridge”. Yes, you have read correctly. The “London Bridge” no longer spans the river Thames in England. In 1968, chain saw entrepreneur Robert L McCulloch purchased the bridge and had it relocated to Lake Havasu. It has become the focal point in this retirement/resort community. This was the perfect venue to hold a BBQ championship.

We arrived late Thursday afternoon. We wanted to experience the whole event. We had reservations at the swanky ‘London Bridge Resort”. This resort is the most luxurious digs in town. Restaurants, bars, several swimming pools with huge water slides, and a spectacular view of the bridge kept us in comfort for our short stay. This was our home base to rejuvenate and prepare for our judging duties.

OLD SCHOOL BBQ

The weather did not co-operate this weekend. The thermometer may have broke seventy degrees but the skies were overcast and dark gray. Late Friday afternoon the skies broke free with its moisture. It rained steady throughout the night. Our barbeque competitors were prepared and battled through. A little rain would not dampen the spirits and fires of these true competitors. I was a little disappointed of the rain because my new bathing suite/ thong was not put to use in the resort pool. The “Cannon Ball’ contest would not be held this year.

Eighty four teams were present this contest. Johnny Trigg of ‘Smokin Triggers’ and Harry Soo of ‘Slap Yo’ Daddy’, two contestants of the first season ‘Pittmaster” reality barbeque television show were holding court. “Big Poppa Smokers’ the reigning champion of the ‘2012 American Royal was competing. The whole country was represented by all the visiting teams. It is always a blast to see and experience the multiple cookers, smokers and barbeques. Every cooker has a story. Each team has a personality. A weekend is a short time to experience them all.

This contest was very special for Ms. Goofy. This would be her 30th contest judged. After completing this event and taking a test she will become a KCBS certified “Master Judge”. This title is prestigious and coveted by all. Because this was her milestone contest she was required to recite the judge’s oath. Ms. Goofy and two others proudly recited the pledge to uphold truth in BBQ judging. It was a proud moment. I do not think that was rain on Ms. Goofy’s cheek.

Snacks for the cooks

Words cannot describe how wonderful it is to taste and score the best barbeque in the nation. Each entry is a heart & soul offering from each competitor. Little variances in seasoning, different cooking methods, and different presentations make my judging duty challenging and rewarding. They are all winners in my book. We do have to pick a winner. ‘Grand Champion”  “Loot N’ Booty BBQ” barbeque team was crowned. Congratulations to all!

The weekend flew by. Ms. Goofy is now a ‘Master Judge’. We scored some spectacular barbeque. The sun did shine. We were rested and rejuvenated. Our adventure was not over because we were on a mission. “What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas will not apply to you dear readers. Stay tuned.

LAKE HAVASU

We are camped out at the swanky 'London Bridge Resort' located in Lake Havasu Arizona. Today is the first day of 'Lake Havasu Music Brews and BBQ Champpionship' Seventy teams from across the nation will be competing and we will have the privilege to judge their entries. This will be Ms. Goofy's thirtieth contest which makes her eligible to join the ranks of the prestigious "Master Judge"rank. Today we will be judging, chili, bbq sauce and a category called 'Anything Goes". 'Anything Goes' is a free for all were competitors just try to impress judges. We expect steak, lobster, and possibly some bacon wrapped treats. We will return next week and share our adventures with you. See you soon.

MASTER JUDGE

“Here comes the Judge, Here comes the Judge”. Here comes the newly crowned Master Judge. I have achieved the coveted title and have been awarded from the Kansas City Barbeque Society status of Master Judge. It has been a fun and tasty journey. I had to judge in 30 competitions. I cooked with a professional team and WON the trophy of Grand Champion. Last, but not least, I completed a grueling written test of barbeque knowledge. I will now proudly wear my new badge of honor. The next contest we attend heads will turn because; “Here comes the Master Judge, Here comes the Master Judge”.

3rd ANNUAL SMOKIN' FOR GOLD

Where can you find a Beer Festival, Car Show, and Barbeque Competition all combined into one fabulous day? This event was called the ‘3rd Annual Smokin for Gold. It was held in Placerville or may I dare to say Hangtown California. In the early days of Placerville hangings were a little too common. Fast forward to our politically correct times and Placerville was the place to be for a wonderful day.

Twenty five teams lit their barbeque fires in the fairgrounds to compete in a State Championship. Five thousand dollars was up for grabs. The teams had a beautiful grass lined arena to do battle. I also heard they did battle with some yellow jackets that smelled the sweet perfume of barbeque smoke.

Ms. Goofy and I donned our judging badges but this was a special judgment day. This would be my thirtieth KCBS competition judged. I am now eligible to become a Master Judge. This prestigious title is accomplished by judging 30 competitions, cooking with a Professional team, and finally taking an exam. The examination is the only thing left to achieve this coveted rank.

The margarita machine sure looked tempting in the heat of the afternoon. The battle was over and the score cards were tabulated. The competition team of ‘Smokey Luv BBQ won the ‘Grand Champion’. Our friends Chuck & Cindy of ‘Bowling Over Pigs’ took ‘Reserve Grand Champion”. Congratulations to all the teams for the great day. Thanks to Marta for organizing one of our favorite events. I now have to study for my test.

SMOKIN’ ON THE WATER

It was another beautiful weekend at Konicti Vista. The sun shined brightly and kept us searching for shade. Twenty one barbeque warriors staged battle for the coveted Grand Champion title. Being a judge has its perks. We were situated in an air conditioned casino. Our hardest duty was to not feed the slot machines too much. This event is one of our favorites. We spend Friday night at the casino hotel to be rested and refreshed for our Saturday judging duties. Friday evening we get to visit with our competitor friends.

You would think with all the barbeque we tasted and judged we would be full. Yes we were but after consuming the 16 ounce chicken fried steak the night before we discovered ‘The Ripper”. The Ripper is an 8 ounce hot dog that is deep fried till it rips open. It is then smothered with chili, cheese and onions. We finished our judging duties around 1:00pm. When the sun began to set my stomach rumbled in anticipation.. It was time to experience ‘The Ripper’.  It was everything you could imagine. Ms. Goofy was not too pleased later in the evening.

The barbeque we tasted was excellent. We never get tired of judging the best barbeque in the nation. Unfortunately we can only pick one overall winner. The barbeque team ‘Woodhouse’ was crowned ‘Grand Champions” Congratulations! This weekend was an exercise in consuming mass quantities of food. We will have to visit the salad bar for several days before we go to Sparks Nevada for the ‘Nugget Rib Cookoff’ It is a tough job but somebody has to do it.

SMOKIN' ON THE WATER

This weekend we will be in Lakeport California at the Konicti Vista casino. The 'Smokin' on the Water' barbeque contest will be held. It will be a great opportunity to taste and experience some of the best BBQ  in the nation. Ms. Goofy and I will be there wearing our judges badges. Hope to see you there.

Konicti Vista Casino

2755 Mission Rancheria Road
Lakeport, CA 95453 - (707) 262-1900

SISKIYOU BEEF COUNTRY COOK-OFF MONTAGUE

Welcome to Montague, Siskiyou County, (Jefferson) California. The Montague ‘Rotary Club’ hosted the ‘Siskiyou Beef Country Cook-off, a KCBS sanctioned inaugural event. The town rolled out the red carpet for the visiting cooks, judges, and hungry public. Montague is a small town with a large and welcoming heart. Montague at one time was a hub for bringing cattle from Nevada, Oregon and California to be loaded on the train. The town is no longer the bustling cow town it once was but the cowboy spirit lives on.

This event was so much more than just a barbeque cook-off. The local farmers market was held showcasing lavenders, honey and produce from the area. Free snow cones were distributed to the kids. I liked the cherry flavor myself. We were entertained by actors staging bank hold-ups firing realistic guns. Wow, those guns were loud. Tractor displays, monuments and just the ambiance of this old town made for a wonderful day.

What event in Northern California would not be complete without the Clampers attending? Yes, E.C.V. the red-shirted fraternal organization had a booth selling various food treats. The smell of barbeque would make anybody hungry. This pig roasting sure looked tempting.

Most important of all, this was a barbeque competition. Once again the judges were spoiled with an air-conditioned hall to perform our tasting and scoring. The outside temperature sweltered in the nineties. The cooks shocked and awed us with their award winning entries. Bill & Yvonne Sousa of the “Big B’s Down & Dirty” team were victorious, winning the trophy of Grand Champion. Congratulations you two!  Thanks to the ‘Montague Rotary Club’ for a great event. This contest has already been put on our calendar for next year.

4th ANNUAL SMOKIN IN THE OAKS

It was smoking in the oaks at Penn Valley, California yesterday. The thermometer hovered in the nineties. This was perfect weather to have a barbeque competition. Twenty five teams braved the sweltering heat to produce award winning BBQ. The heat did not dissuade the crowd from enjoying the day. There was a long line forming before the 1:00pm start time. The public would gain free entry with a canned food item. They were then able to purchase food sample tickets for a nominal fee.

This event was held in a lovely venue. There were brand new Bocce Ball courts, swimming pool, Frisbee golf course, picnic areas and plenty of trees to hide from the sun. The judges today were especially spoiled. We were situated in an air conditioned house with all the amenities. We even had our own kitchen in case we were still hungry after judging the four meat categories. That was a joke son!

Sierra Nevada Beer had a booth that probably set a record in sales. I am sure the lemonade and ice cream venders were not far behind. Once you had your fill of BBQ and beverages it was prudent to find some shade and enjoy the music. Several bands played throughout the day. What a day it was.

Today the Grand Champion of the BBQ competition was the team of ‘Big B’s Down & Dirty’. Our friends, Bill, Yvonne and Eddie Souza are the backbone and cookers of this very special award winning team. Congratulations!!!!!!!  Last but not least a special shoutout to Scott Gomes who created a wonderful event: Scott you created a masterpiece. See you at the next competition.